I Can't See Straight or At All..

Please help me I am driven by my drives
But all I want is love, somehow, rromance
Mail order substance X from Paris, France
Or meld me with some other peoples' lives
Or plant me in a radiant new shell
Or mind control the females in the yard
Or teach me how to lose my natural guard
Perform your actions fast and now and well
For I grow so impatient waiting on
A Love? A wife? A toy? A 'her'? A thing?
We're all so tired from the fast running
I'd take whatever, pack up and be gone
Aw, hell, I'm still at my computer screen
Deciphering what the hell these syllables mean